On Bruised Egos

Apparently my opinions, and subsequent requirements, for dating on men’s grooming, proper grammar, etc. bruise some men’s egos.

When I posted about men’s grooming, I stated that I think men with long hair and/or long goatee’s are gross.  I’ve also stated that I don’t like facial tattoos, that I prefer men with brains who use proper grammar and spelling, etc… There’s a list, which list is the reason I haven’t been on a date in a LONG time.  Boo hoo hoo.  But not really, because I have STANDARDS.

Now apparently, these standards have bruised some egos.  I’m not saying I’m the prettiest, or the funniest, or the most politically-correct, or the most anything, or that I don’t occasionally have typos, or even that I don’t misspell a word once a blue moon or so.  I’m just saying I have a specific set of standards.

THIS guy does NOT meet those standards!

On that dating website, I have received multiple messages from the guy above.  He calls himself “shalom” and, apparently, was a professional sand volleyball player.  He has a really crappy homemade tattoo of his nickname “sexy sandman” with a large plamtree on his back.  He is missing a LARGE chunk of his front tooth.  He’s creepy muscular, and his long hair reminds me of a scraggly dog.  I chose not to respond to his messages because I was taught that when you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.  Apparently, that’s the wrong approach.  After the third time of ignoring his messages, he chose to respond to my requirements point by point.  He took the time to tell me that he just ended his beach volleyball career A YEAR AGO and that he is looking for a new job.  HE’S BEEN UNEMPLOYED FOR A YEAR!!!  He pointed out that his poor grammar hides his high IQ.  He then must have gotten offended, at some point, by my grammar requirement because he then pointed out that I used the number 2 twice.  My grammatical error has since been rectified; his jobless state, I’m sure, has not.  I won’t regal you with the remaining details of his LONG message, mostly because they didn’t regal me, either, but also because it’s just not worth either your or my time.

Needless to say, I have continued to ignore that fool him.

Next up is my new favorite, the mystery blog comment-poster, “Steve”.  Steve, you are, by far, the man of my dreams.  I can just tell based upon the comment you made on my men’s grooming post:

“So in other words, the only men you would like are the effeminate little latte-sippers driving around in their hybrids, right? You know, the kind of guys the women on the View dictate that you accept? I’m sure the real men won’t mind if you take yourself out of the heterosexual dating pool and accept your inner lesbian.”

Let’s take this one point at time.

Steve states I only like “effeminate little latte-sippers“.  I’m not sure that I like “effeminate” men, rather, I prefer a man who smells nice, wears clean clothes, and is neatly groomed.  I guess if THAT is effeminate, then I do like effeminate men.  I wasn’t aware that being cleanly and groomed made a man effeminate.  Men, please weigh in on this idea at any point.  As for “little latte-sippers“, I will admit that my general type is a thin man closer to my own height than not.  I don’t know why that is, it just is.  That doesn’t make them effeminate or little, just short and thin.   As for the “latte-sippers” part, I’d like to point out that people can drink WHATEVER THE HELL THEY WANT.  That’s a stupid statement.

Steve goes on to state that  the men I like drive “around in their hybrids”.  Driving a hybrid or not makes no difference to me.  Driving a car or a truck make no difference to me.  Seriously.  I could care less about cars. I  prefer that a man has a car, and that that car won’t endanger my life, thereby putting my son at risk for a motherless childhood, but still, hybrids aren’t a requirement.

Here’s what I drive, except scrape off a bunch of paint on the bumper to make it yellow and add tons of door dings from when I worked at The Retail Store.  Do you honestly think I care about cars?!

Next point:  “You know, the kind of guys the women on the View dictate that you accept?”  The View?!  I have NEVER even seen The View, but is sounds like YOU HAVE, Steve.  If that’s your kind of TV show, I won’t judge.  I, though, wouldn’t have the first clue about what kind of man the women on that show supposedly dictate women should date.  Why don’t you leave me another comment explaining it for me.  I’m kind of low on blog topics, anyway.

And lastly, Steve addresses my sexuality:  “I’m sure the real men won’t mind if you take yourself out of the heterosexual dating pool and accept your inner lesbian.” Sorry,  really tall, overweight men with creepy long hair; crappy goatees; unkempt, dirty, grunge clothes; nauseating body odor; and shitty rist-bucket cars  REAL men, I am unequivocally heterosexual, so I won’t be taking myself out of the heterosexual dating pool.  I am a firm supporter of gay rights, though.  And to tell me that I need to “accept my inner lesbian” isn’t an insult to me.  It IS insulting and, quite frankly, disgusting of YOU, to continue to use statements like that AS insults.

Steve, I see you have good grammar, spelling, and punctuation, but if the size of your mind indicates the size of any of your other “assets”, I think it’s better for everyone if you do ALL women and men a favor and take YOURSELF out of ALL dating pools and become strictly asexual.  We don’t need any more small-minded bigots reproducing.

In short, I seem to have bruised some men’s egos by refusing to lower my standards to douche.  Generally, this is where someone would apologize for hurting someone else’s feelings, but I seem to find myself not giving a douche-sized turd.

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8 thoughts on “On Bruised Egos

  1. Anxiously awaiting Steve’s counter display of flawless intelligence. Or the online equivilant of putting gum in your hair, whichever.

  2. I wish I had come up with the phrase “not giving a douche sized turd” lol you make me laugh and smile and feel proud to be related to you

  3. You know, when I first read that original post, I did think “Hmmm… that’s a very extensive list” but then… what if you didn’t have a list at all? I mean, I’m trying to think of it this way:

    If a guy just wants a warm place to insert his penis (like any place would do), he’s a man-slut. If he’s got requirements or standards, he’s either trying to take himself out of the game by not needing to try, or he’s got an overly high regard for himself.

    There doesn’t seem to be a sensible middle ground when it comes to external perceptions.

    1. True enough. I don’t feel that my list is actually that long. It’s solid, and it’s inflexible – at least the original requirements. The remaining “options”, if you will, are like extra features on a car – nice to have, but not required. I would rather be thought of as having overly-high regard for myself, because I do have high regard for myself.
      🙂

      1. Ah, but there’s a difference between overly-high and high. Everyone should have a high regard for themselves… but some people (and I’m not at all suggesting that this includes you) think too highly of themselves.

        Sad but true. I work with some of them.

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